Gnomey
Gnomey is the gnome who constantly gives you different tips/advice bubbles at the top of the quests page. Once he reaches level 50 he will ascend and award you 25,000 punchos. Keep in mind you start with Gnomey (50 level), then get Dnomey, Cnomey, Bnomey, Anemone and Fnomey, in order. One of the gnomes is you all along. As of version 1.2.7 all gnomes update or 'deify' after level 50. Once you unlock a new Gnome he says something unique! 1) 2) 3) My name is Cnomey! I'm not an actual gnome, but an artsy metaphor! 4) "UR A BUTT" -- Bnomey 5) I'm Anemone! I live under the sea! I catch food with my CNIDOCYTES. Here is a list of the things that he says: 1) Try SMASHING red wraiths instead of dash punching them. 2) Hushed legends tell of ULTRA HATS, crafted by the gnome gods. 3) Punchville Gnomes in da hizouse. 4) Fill up your energy-meter to unleash your SUPER move! 5) All life descended from gnomes! Deal with it! 6) You should probably spend all these PUNCHOS on hats. 7) Jumps slow you down! Dash punch to regain speed before landing! 8) Use the secret H.A.T.Z. system to slighty reduce hat sizes! 9) I'm not shrieking! This is my advice voice! 10) Ancient civilization crumbled after the Nimblebit/Zinggu Wars of 202X. 11) There are three different ways around orc shields! 12) I call this punching move "The Pain Song", it's a good one. 13) OOooOooOOoOOoOOoOOOo! 14) Gnomes wore hats before humans. Stop copying us! 15) My mother's beard waas the loveliest shade of red. 16) Ancient skeletons are jerks, but they can be tricked! 17) Listen to my advice! Perform STRATEGIC punching! 18) Blue orcs are commonly known as "Blorcs" by orc experts. 19) I saw a frog up here, once. It was terrifying! 20) The three secrets of life! Punching, Lunching, Hat Fashion. 21) Help me attain godhood by doing these arbitrary QUESTS. 22) You can barely outsmash an ancient skeleton's jump! 23) Blocks also make you stop moving, you only lose your combo if hit! 24) GNOME MERCY! 25) Only you can increase my GNOME LEVEL by doing GNOME QUESTS. 26) I'm stuck up here with nothing but a huge hoard of treasure! 27) Red imps' fiirebarfs bounce! Watch out! 28) The Golden Egg was inside all our hearts the entire time! 29) Blocking can save you in a bad situation, but ruins your combo! 30) Name your favorite punch techniques: "The Stingler" 31) Multiple smash punches make you fall a little faster. 32) Don't uppercut skull squids, try something else! 33) The Ancients worshipped a god they called "The Big Runner". 34) Blocking reduces your energy! Getting hit increases it! 35) Powerups and foods give a random supermove! Deal with it! 36) I'm Gnomey, doncha know me??? 37) Why am I up here? Help me get down! 38) Watch out for snaks! Ooo! I mean snakes! 39) I saw a huge gnome doing somersaults and it scared me! 40) That ghost statue gives me the CREEPS! Smash it! 41) Imagine a huge fist punching a statue of McPixel, forever. 42) Red imps are known as RIMPS. Purple imps: PLIMPS. 43) Keep doing quests to increase GNOME LEVEL. 44) Uppercuts and slams do extra damage! Use them wisely! 45) Can YOU find the secret "Horse Mode"? 46) This move is called "The Monk Dunk', I just invented it! 47) Did yo uget that PUNCH CHART I sent you, it's important. 48) Statues are evil! Punch them! 49) Dash Punch an uppercutted zombie to fling it before it explodes! 50) Certain hats give a 0.012% damage boost, not saying which! 51) Bats are unpredictable! Try launching something into them! 52) I really hate bees. I hate them! 53) Gnome-vision goggles let you experience life as a gnome! 54) Ancient civilizations used this area to place tacky statues. 55) Don't punch spiked shields! They'll make GONG noises! 56) Vases are evil! Punch them! 57) You can't punch a ghost! Or... can you? 58) Someone sure does love vases, I see them all over the place! 59) Plan your punches tactically using your PUNCH CHART! 60) The Cyberclops braintube will glow brightly before it punches! 61) I got a "level up", but is it enough to defeat King Slug?? 62) I can turn into a tree! 63) They're made out of MEAT. 64) My feet hurt! 65) gNoMeZ rUle 66) Follow the blinking gnome head FOR GREAT GLORY. 67) Gnome advice is the best advice! Gnome wisdom! 68) Block the Cyclops, then counter punch! 69) Megaskull has a weak jaw. Try uppercuts! 70) Gnomes invented punching, but WE used it only for good! 71) THE WELL OF WISHES HIDES IN THE CRYPT OF DECAY